🍒Chapter 34: He is still holding back
After replying to the last of his messages, Shen Shuyi realised the sky was already growing dark. Uncle Qian came to remind him that dinner was ready.
Shen Shuyi answered softly, rubbing his sore waist and back as he pushed himself up. For the first time in a week, he managed to get out of bed on his own. Until now, he had not even gone to the bathroom without Xie Chenzhou carrying him.
The memory made his face burn with shame, but these past days he truly had no strength. Supporting himself against the wall, he slowly wobbled into the bathroom.
When he caught sight of himself in the mirror, he froze. His clothes were not properly fastened, and the skin that showed was covered with scattered marks. It was unbearable to look at. Blushing furiously, Shen Shuyi tugged his pyjamas into place and buttoned them all the way to the top. A heat period really was too frightening.
Once he had tidied himself up, he finally went downstairs. To his surprise, Xie Chenzhou had also returned. Shen Shuyi almost jumped. He thought Xie Chenzhou would still be busy, probably working late into the night. He had not been prepared to face him while fully awake.
“Young master, you’re back,” Uncle Qian greeted warmly. Spotting Shen Shuyi, he brightened. “Mr Shen is here too. Why don’t you eat together in the dining room?”
He helped set the table before retreating with the other servants, leaving the room quiet.
The dining room was cold and spacious, with a large table. Shen Shuyi and Xie Chenzhou sat at opposite ends. They had eaten here together before, but tonight the room felt strangely empty. Shen Shuyi gave a light cough, and immediately Xie Chenzhou lifted his eyes from his bowl.
“I am fine now,” Shen Shuyi quickly explained, worried Xie Chenzhou might think he was still unwell. “My body feels much better. Thank you, Mr Xie.”
“En.” Xie Chenzhou lowered his gaze again and began to eat.
Shen Shuyi noticed faint shadows under his eyes. Had he not been sleeping well? His energy seemed lacking. That was strange. Shen Shuyi himself had also been exhausted this past week, but after getting up today, he felt refreshed aside from the soreness in his waist. Why was it the opposite for Xie Chenzhou? Could his suspicion be correct? Was his condition worsening?
“Mr Xie, have you been sleeping well these days? Have you been taking your pheromone suppressant regularly?” Shen Shuyi asked as he ladled a bowl of soup and gently pushed it toward him.
Xie Chenzhou’s chopsticks paused slightly. As Shen Shuyi withdrew his hand, the back of it brushed against Xie Chenzhou’s little finger, and he clearly felt it tremble.
He is still holding back. The thought flashed through Shen Shuyi’s mind. His knowledge of Enigmas was shallow, yet he was certain. Xie Chenzhou was restraining himself. But he did not know how to say aloud that he did not need to. He was not Xie Chenzhou, and he could not feel what he was enduring. And if he really told him to stop holding back, what consequences would follow?
He dared not risk it. Instead, he tried another way. “Mr Xie, I misunderstood you before. You were helping me, yet I still spoke harshly. I apologise. I am grateful you stayed with me through this heat period.”
Xie Chenzhou continued eating.
No reaction? Shen Shuyi tilted his head, then added, “What I said before was true. At the school dance, you told me you wanted to mark me every day. I don’t know how serious you were, but what I said was true. You can mark me.”
“Shen Shuyi.” Xie Chenzhou set down his bowl and closed his eyes briefly, steadying himself. “If you are only saying this to comfort me, then don’t. You don’t know what I am thinking. I have seen psychologists. It was useless. They treated me as if I were insane.”
“I didn’t know…” Shen Shuyi murmured. No wonder he held such prejudice against counsellors. “I was not trying to comfort you, Mr Xie-”
“Eat.” Xie Chenzhou clearly wanted to end the conversation.
Shen Shuyi had half expected this, yet he still felt deflated. So much for being clever against him all this time. His confidence wavered. He really had little experience with being liked. Should he ask Third Brother? No, Third Brother was far too gossipy. He would have to think of something himself.
Dinner ended quietly. Xie Chenzhou, as usual, went to the basement. Shen Shuyi wandered the first floor before deciding to exercise. After a week of inactivity, his body felt stiff. He was about to take the elevator upstairs when he heard the faint sound of the security camera shifting. He froze, then chose to take the stairs instead.
Supporting his waist, he climbed slowly. At the last step to the second floor, he deliberately staged a clumsy stumble. “Ah…” He sat down heavily by the railing, clutching his ankle.
Before long, Xie Chenzhou came up the stairs. Shen Shuyi looked at him with misty eyes and said weakly, “Mr Xie, I fell just now…”
Without surprise, Xie Chenzhou bent down, slid one arm beneath his knees and the other under his arm, and lifted him effortlessly. Carrying him back, he passed his own room, but Shen Shuyi tugged at his sleeve. “My pyjamas and toiletries are still in your room,” he whispered.
Xie Chenzhou paused, then carried him into his own bedroom and laid him on the bed. Shen Shuyi’s fake fall had been poorly acted, but he had truly twisted his ankle. Pulling up his trouser leg, he saw the swelling. Xie Chenzhou fetched the medicine box, and when he returned, the scent of his pheromones seemed stronger than before.
The bedroom was saturated with it. It lingered on the sheets, the pillows, the wardrobe, the carpet, and even on Shen Shuyi himself. Yet the scent coming from Xie Chenzhou’s body was strongest of all.
Kneeling before him, Xie Chenzhou placed Shen Shuyi’s foot on his knee, warmed some medicinal liquid in his palm, and began to massage it into the swollen ankle. His broad hand rubbed over pale skin, the slender arch of the foot faintly showing the blue veins beneath, all of it contrasting with the bronze of his own skin.
The pheromone thickened, wrapping around Shen Shuyi like a serpent, sliding over his body and lingering insistently at the gland on the nape of his neck. Xie Chenzhou’s breathing grew heavier. His pheromones were more honest and direct than he was. Yet his face remained calm, betraying nothing.
In that moment, Shen Shuyi realised he had been too hasty before. Xie Chenzhou was right. He did not truly understand him or what he endured. No ordinary person could. No wonder he distrusted counsellors.
If Shen Shuyi recklessly tried to “help” again without thought, it might destroy them both. He resolved to pull back, to treat him as if distance still remained.
But some things could never return to the way they were. For example, Xie Chenzhou’s pheromones. They were intoxicating. Even if Xie Chenzhou resisted, Shen Shuyi could not.
That night, after Xie Chenzhou finished tending to his ankle, Shen Shuyi accidentally dragged him onto the bed. As a result, he spent another three days recuperating before finally returning to work.
On his first day back, the tasks were light. He stayed in Xie Cheng’s office, organising health check reports. He wore a high-collared shirt, his exposed skin free of marks. To be safe, he had even placed a plaster over his gland.
Yet, when he went to the tea room for water, he overheard staff whispering.
“Madam came back to work today.”
“President Xie also resumed work.”
“Didn’t he already return before?”
“That was only for meetings. This time is different.”
“Then… is President Xie in susceptibility period again?”
“Of course. Didn’t you see how Madam was dressed? He even had a plaster on his neck. President Xie must have bitten him.”
“Shhh, don’t gossip about the president’s private matters.”
“Well, Madam is just a Beta. He cannot be marked. Having an injury there is normal… at least it shows their relationship is good.”
“Still, what does President Xie see in him?”
“Shhh, Madam just walked past. Stop talking.”
Yes. That was the question.
What exactly did Xie Chenzhou see in him?
It could not possibly be his supposed passion in bed. Shen Shuyi’s face turned red. No way. He was not that passionate. It had just been the pheromones, his first time, and during a heat period. Anyone would lose control. It could not be that.
Perhaps he should start by learning more about Xie Chenzhou’s past, and about him as a person. The thought seemed reasonable. Returning to his desk, Shen Shuyi took out a notebook and listed the things he wanted to do, one by one. It was time to put them into action.
*Translator: thank you for reading 💋
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